Family Member's Troubles Prompt Painful Inquiries

D ear Zazz: I have an alcohol- and drug-abusing family member, andpeople are always asking me, "How's Joe doing?" Well, he's not doingwell, and I don't feel like telling people this.

Please advise your readers not to ask such questions of those ofus who have loved ones like Joe in our lives. Unless I bring him up,don't ask about him. It's hard to choke back the tears when I talkabout him.

DON'T ASK ME

Dear Don't: Some people in your situation welcome questionsabout troubled loved ones. They find it helpful to have asupportive, understanding friend who shows concern, and they're eagerto hear about possible solutions for their loved ones' problems. Orthey …